


There Is so Much I Want to Say

by MyColorfulMind



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: 177(6) verse, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Feelings, Fluff, Fluffity Fluff Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-10
Updated: 2016-08-10
Packaged: 2018-08-07 19:28:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7726876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyColorfulMind/pseuds/MyColorfulMind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hercules folds the letter with careful precision and places it in an envelope, taking the time to ink a calligraphy scrawl containing “Tommy” on the outside. Somehow it became a thing in this life--calling him Tommy. Perhaps it was started by James, he doesn’t really remember, but it’s one of the many ways to distinguish Thomas Jefferson from Thomas Jemmings. He’s a completely new person who’s trying to repair his previous mistakes. He doesn’t have to, but he’s trying. And it astounds Hercules to no end; Thomas astounds him to no end.</p><p>[ Fanfic based on and inspired by Kookookarli's 177(6) series ]</p>
            </blockquote>





	There Is so Much I Want to Say

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Let's Make It A Drinking Game](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7372183) by [ashilrak](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashilrak/pseuds/ashilrak). 



> ** If you haven't already, you should read Chapter 16 of Let's Make It A Drinking Game by Kookookarli (the one with the letters). This will make more sense if you do. Also, if you haven't read 177(6) by Kookookarli, what are you waiting for? It will bring you so much happiness and joy and feels. Now, onto the fluff!

Hercules folds the letter with careful precision and places it in an envelope, taking the time to ink a calligraphy scrawl containing “Tommy” on the outside. Somehow it became a thing in this life--calling him Tommy. Perhaps it was started by James, he doesn’t really remember, but it’s one of the many ways to distinguish Thomas Jefferson from Thomas Jemmings. He’s a completely new person who’s trying to repair his previous mistakes. He doesn’t have to, but he’s trying. And it astounds Hercules to no end; Thomas astounds him to no end.

A small smile finds its way to his face without his knowledge as he looks towards Thomas, the sleeping being who's beneath sheets nearly up to his nose. His heart swells when he looks away and takes a breath. This is so new, so incredibly infuriatingly new. But he loves it, because while Alexander and their entire gang share inside secrets they’ve harbored for centuries, him and Tommy are creating new ones every day.

Now is when Hercules feels most at ease to be himself without restrictions, when all the others are asleep and it’s quiet. He doesn’t know what pressed him to go into Room 176 to write, but Thomas’ roommates were out: Aaron on a date with Dori and James out catching up with Dolley. It’s late, and Hercules didn’t want to chance John or Alex waking up and reading over his shoulder, fearing questions he didn't feel like answering. They just don’t get it. The moment they got their memories (Alex first, but that’s beside the point) they knew exactly who they were to be with, they just had to find them. But him… He still gets nervous butterflies in his stomach.

He had a feeling Eliza would try to get it, since it’s practically second nature for her to be empathetic. Maria was probably the person he felt closest to next to Thomas; he considers her his confidant. But this is different. This is way too important to share with anyone else.

The letter in his hand feels heavy as props it up against the lamp on the nightstand. This is it, this is the last night he can say he never said it, but it feels right. It feels like everything’s in alignment for once, and that brings another smile to his face before he’s turning out the light and walking around to the other side of the bed. He pulls back the cover and slides in easy enough, although he thinks the kiss he places on Thomas’ forehead may have been too much because the taller of the two stretches just a bit, and Hercules realizes he probably woke him.

“Hey, babe,” comes the greeting, Tommy’s voice laden with sleep, “What are you doing in here? Won’t James freak out again?”

He shrugs at first but then elaborates. “He’s not here right now—him or Aaron, actually. I just needed a place where it was quiet.”

Even in the dark, Hercules can see a lazy smile on his boyfriend’s face before he outstretches his arm so he can cuddle in. It’s warm, so so warm, and the tailor can't really stop the contented hum that leaves his throat.

The standard bed for the dorms is small in general, so essentially, they're crammed together on what feels to be smaller than a twin bed, but neither of them can form a complaint. Their faces are mere inches from each other, but neither make a move. Tommy's hand is on Hercules’ back, and Hercules, after a bit of contemplation, reaches to entangle one hand in the other's mess of curls. His hair isn't as neat as it'll be tomorrow, and it's got a few tangles, but it's still incredibly soft. Thomas leans into it.

“I just want to… thank you. For being… for being you.” the words feel overindulgent in their intimate state, but he can’t stop. Hercules has felt way too inspired by recent events to stop now. “You inspire me to,” but what was he going to say? You inspire me to be a better person? No, that’s a cheesy line that belongs in a RomCom somewhere. The truth is that he just inspires him in every aspect of his life so he decides to leave it there, scratching gently behind Tommy’s ear. “Go back to sleep.”

He knows Thomas is still hesitant about certain things; he will leave the room or conversation if things get too serious. Maybe he doesn’t accept them, maybe he can’t, but either way that’s okay. Hercules is more than okay with that because he understands that everyone progresses at their own pace in everything, he himself only having come to terms with it about a week or two before. And even with the knowledge he now has pouring out of his heart, he decided to keep his letter fairly short. Slowly slowly, softly softly, quality over quantity. Though he could probably fill two binders with what he’s feeling now, he knows that would be too much. And why rush such a beautiful thing when they still have all the time in the world?

However, at this moment, seeing as though it was late, sleep was the obvious answer. Thomas doesn’t seem to be phased though, as he hums and tightens his grip a little. “What time is it?”

“Late.”

“Fair enough.”

They both collapse into quiet giggles, the noise echoing off the walls in the silent room and filling the space around them in warmth. In one fluid movement, Hercules turns over so that his back is flush against Thomas and Thomas’ arm is draped over him. Not even giving him a chance to take it back, Hercules entangles his fingers with the hand on his stomach and may or may not press a kiss to each of his boyfriend’s knuckles.

The tailor finishes the night off by taking a deep breath. Things would never be the same, but they would be okay. They would be better.

* * *

The very first thing he feels the next morning is a pair of lips on his and two palms on either side of his face, fingertips grasping, joyful, morning breath be damned. His eyes flutter open as soon as his mouth is free again, and even sleepy, Hercules can swear he sees a teary-eyed Thomas.

"I love you too.” The sentence that comes from Thomas’ throat makes him laugh despite himself, giddy written on his face. Even with sleep and confusion still clouding his brain, Hercules feels relief flood his body as he puts his hands over the ones still on his face.

“Really?”

“Really.”

Another kiss is placed and then all of the sensations are gone from him. Tommy is backtracking and retrieving the letter from where he had laid it on the bed, waving it around in the direction of where Hercules is laying. “You,” Thomas tries to begin but then shakes his head, still with a stupid grin on his face, “Dinner. You and me, we have to go to a proper dinner tonight.”

Hercules is now propping himself up on his elbows so he can scoot back up to sit against the headboard, with a grin matching the one on the boy who’s standing over him. “We can’t afford that.”

“We’ll figure out something. I- I may have been saving up for something special…”

“Oh Tommy-“ he starts, but then he sees Thomas begin to fidget. His gaze takes a softened turn as he reaches for his partner’s hands on instinct. “Thank you.” He says simply, leaning up to snag another kiss.

The moment begged for Thomas to get back into the warmth of the bed, to take off the glasses that Hercules adored so well and come cuddle and be lazy in the morning sun filtering through. But the bubble is broken, and Tommy is pulling away, leaving Hercules trying to follow with a pitter-patter in his heart.

“I’ve got to go to class.”

“Oh. Right.” he says, because it’s quite easy to forget such trivial things when the day could spent so magnificently. But now that it's been brought to his attention, he can see that Tommy is dressed properly and his hair is fixed just so.

.“I just picked up your letter on my way out to get breakfast, and I had to see you before I left.” It was said quickly as if he were  going to be late for class, but Hercules disproves this theory when he takes a quick look at his watch. It’s okay though. Hercules knows it will take time for Thomas to get used to certain things. But he is more than willing to wait.  

He squeezes his hands and smiles so gently. “I’m glad you did. How about we talk later, and you work on getting your cute ass to class.”

Again, and maybe to ease the rush of emotions, they laugh. Hercules falls back down and sinks into the mattress as he watches Thomas leave the dorm, still with a grin and maybe a bounce to his step. He whispers “I love you” before he goes, and “I love _you”_ is said in response.

He can’t say it hasn’t been building to this. They both knew it, they both felt it, it just boiled down to who was going to say it first. And he wanted it to be special; he wanted it to feel untouchable, like a process long forgotten by time itself. Alex helped him with that, awakening memories that were forgotten in the dusty cobwebs of his former mind. A love letter. He wanted to write the most eloquent letter even though he was admittedly bad with words. Maybe that’s just something else that Thomas inspired him to do.

It’s still quiet, he now realizes, as everything settles down around him. The other two the room belongs to either aren’t back yet or have already gone out. It’s nice, and Hercules contemplates just staying for awhile. His class doesn’t start for another hour and a half, but he still feels like he should get up.

So he hops out from underneath the warm cover and retrieves his box of emergency clothes from beneath the bed (which was really just a fresh pair of jeans and a t-shirt). He began keeping clothes in Room 176 when Alex, John, Eliza, and Maria requested their ever infamous alone time. It’s just something Hercules likes to keep up now, in the case that he stays over. So he changes his clothes and makes the bed (something Tommy usually doesn’t do, but he thinks it a nice touch) before rushing out the door and down to his favorite coffee shop down the road, a mere 3 minute walk from the dorms.

This is the beginning of something so incredibly good, Hercules can feel it in his bones, and he couldn’t get rid of his happy mood if he tried.

**Author's Note:**

> I'll try to keep this short because I can ramble with the best of them, but I have to mention how much this entire group means to me. Karli is such an inspiration, honestly. Her writing is incredible and she's introduced me to the greatest group of friends a person could ask for <3 I can't thank her enough. And to everyone in the 177(6) roleplay group/chat, thank you, bless you. I'm not that good with people, I get nervous easily, but every single one of you make me feel so welcomed and like I have a place to belong. I'm not good at explaining things, but just know that I love you all so so much. You mean the world to me <33


End file.
